No more self-doubt: How to develop a new zest for life and overcome the fear of change
- Merle Reimers
- Jun 13, 2024
- 4 min read
In a world full of expectations and constant change, we often feel overwhelmed. Self-doubt gnaws at us and prevents us from reaching our full potential. But deep down within us lies the desire to try new hobbies, to develop ourselves further, and to experience more joy in life. The fear of change and our possible failure, however, holds us back. How can we break through this vicious cycle? How can we free ourselves from our self-doubt and find the courage to embark on new adventures? In this article, I will show you how to overcome your fears and find your way to a more fulfilling life.
1. Recognize and accept your self-doubt and fear.
The first step to overcoming self-doubt and fear is to recognize and accept them. We all have it, and it is human to let it influence us. Instead of fighting against it, accept it now and understand that it often results from past experiences and limiting beliefs. They have helped and even protected us in a difficult situation. And you can actually be grateful for that. But now it is time to let them go because they limit your life and you no longer need them.
Exercise: Write down your self-doubts and question them: Are they really true? Often, they are just a distorted perception of our reality. To what extent have you benefited from this doubt and fear so far? What decisions have you not had to make because of it? Where have you not had to grow but stay in your cozy comfort zone?
2. Small steps lead to big goals.
Change does not have to be radical. Start with small, manageable steps. Set realistic goals and celebrate every small success. If you want to discover a new passion, start with a simple activity that interests you. Maybe it´s a new course or a book on a topic you find exciting. Allow yourself to grow slowly and step by step. If you have no idea where to start, make a list of things you enjoyed doing as a child. Most of the time, we still enjoy these things as adults.
3. Surround yourself with positivity!
The people we surround ourselves with have a huge impact on our attitude and our self-confidence. Look for positive, uplifting, and supportive people who encourage and inspire you. “You are the average of the five people you surround yourself with” is a provocative but refreshing quote from Jim Rohn. So which five people do you surround yourself with most of the time? What interests do they have?Are they happy for you or do they question and envy your every move?Tip: Find a community or circle of friends, that share the same interests. Exchanging ideas with like-minded people can be incredibly motivating and help you discover new hobbies and passions. If you are still looking for these people, go to places where you can learn the skill or hobby. A language school, a library, a running club, a cooking class, a sports hall, etc.
4. Visualize your goal.
Visualization is a powerful tool to overcome your fears and gain clarity. Imagine yourself pursuing your new passion and feeling joy and fulfillment. We need coherent behavior to change. This means that our thoughts and feelings must be in harmony. We often think one thing and feel another. So here it is about uniting our thoughts (= language of our brain) with our feelings (= language of the body). Because only when both are in harmony can we experience something new. Otherwise, we will always only get the same old result.
Exercise: Take a few minutes every day to visualize your goals and wishes. Imagine how it feels to overcome your fears and leave your self-doubt behind. How does this new version of you feel who goes through life without fear and self-doubt? What decisions does she make? What actions does she take? Who are the people she is surrounded by? How does she live her life?
5. Accept the fear of change.
Fear is a natural companion to any change. It shows us that we are venturing out of our comfort zone. Instead of pushing the fear away, accept it as part of the process. What is it trying to protect you from? What might it be trying to tell you? Is that your voice, or does it sound familiar but belongs to someone else?
Strategy: Confront your fears step by step. Imagine the worst-case scenario. Now think of three steps that could ease the result or even prevent it altogether. Make small changes in your life and observe how you feel. Slowly move out of your comfort zone and get your system used to the change. Over time, you will notice that the fear decreases, and your self-confidence grows.
6. Be patient with yourself!
Change takes time and patience. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to make mistakes. Every step you take brings you closer to your goal. When you catch yourself internally beating yourself up, stop yourself. Stop, observe, and think about how you would talk to your best friend if she were in the same situation. We are often our own biggest critics. Give yourself a little love. Because you deserve to be treated well, not only by others but also by yourself!
Reminder: Success is not a straight path. There are ups and downs, and that's perfectly fine. Stick with it and trust that you are on the right path. Daily affirmation: I allow myself to make mistakes, learn from them, and grow from them.
Self-doubt and fear of change can hold us back, but they don't have to mean the end of our dreams. With small steps, positive influences, and a clear vision, you can discover new hobbies and rediscover your joy in life to live a life full of abundance. Give yourself permission to grow and learn. Your path to a fulfilling life begins with the first step - and that is in your hands.
You got this! ❤
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